Diary of a Lady-Killer (1969)

Koh Nakahira (as Yang Shu-hsi)

Hong Kong

96 min, color, Mandarin (English subtitles)

Review © 2003 Branislav L. Slantchev

Yet another film helmed by a Japanese import director, which probably explains much of the look and feel that harkens back to a classy Nikkatsu production. The title was misleading, at least for me, because I did not realize that the moniker "lady-killer" refers to a handsome philanderer. I thought that this would be a film about a lady who is a killer and who is writing about it in a diary. But it's not. Instead, it's about a fairly successful womanizer who writes a diary but whose conquests begin turning up dead. So there's murder, all right, just the type I expected.

The suicide that starts it all	The Diary of a Lady-Killer

The film opens with an extremely moody sequence in which the camera slowly pans across a busy office, and momentarily rests on an empty desk. We soon learn that the occupant of this desk is dangling outside from the ledge. She is a young woman who apparently has shame issues that she resolves by committing suicide (in a disturbing shot that tracks her flight to the asphalt down below).

Could you give me his home address?	Fang Ying pointedly ignores the suitor

Her sister explains to the police that she was pregnant by some unknown guy, who never called her back. Obviously, the police can do nothing about it, but Miss Lin (the sister) resolves to track down the bastard, which she does fairly quickly although how exactly the doorman would remember anyone from over six months ago would remain somewhat blurry regardless of the amount of money she uses as inducement.

What do you mean, no sex till marriage?	Chin Han sporting a CYF-style look

The bastard turns out (not surprisingly) to be Chin Han who plays the slick Zhou, the general manager of a successful car dealership. He is handsome, well-to-do, and loves women. No crime, as far as I can tell. His problem is that his fiancee Xiulan (Fang Ying) won't put out. She is the old-fashioned (stupid) type that thinks that she can go off and spend years in Japan while leaving her hubby out to dry in Hong Kong. The long distance relationship is hard as it is, and it can't be made easier by refusing to sleep with said man upon return to HK.

Bowling alone? Not in the 60s!	Fanny Fan in her last shower scene

So, following her dismissal, Zhou goes to a bowling alley, where he picks up the delectable Fanny Fan. They end up in a shower faster than they do in modern movies. Then he follows Margaret Tu to a movie theater, and they end up in bed, just as quickly. All of this he diligently writes down in his diary, which he has cleverly hidden in a special apartment that he rents under the guise of penning the next best-seller.

Movies alone? I don't think so	Margaret Tu in her last bed scene

Naturally, Fang Ying decides to surprise her man by making a sudden visit to his place. This is just a bad idea. The problem with unannounced visits is that you might see something you may not like. In this case, she tracks him down to the apartment, where she locates the diary. This breaks her heart, although it's not quite clear why he could not simply claim that he was writing a (bad) novel.

Nothing good ever came from reading	How to pick up the artsy type

Undeterred, in the meantime Zhou is seducing Tina Ti, who is the busty artsy type. This also goes quite well but unfortunately some friends of her show up and spoil the consummation. Then the bodies of his conquests begin to pile up, giving Zhou the uneasy feeling that someone out there may have a bone to grind with him. But who or why, he does not know. Unfortunately, we do know, which means that most of the film is lacking in suspense.

Tina Ti is a work of art...	...my thoughts exactly

Without telling the ending, it will suffice to say that Zhou fails to save any of the three latest conquests. He ends up in prison but his icy fiancee who totally believes in his innocence (for the killing thing, the screwing thing he admitted to her) hires a private eye to find out the truth. This is admittedly difficult, especially since appeals in Hong Kong happen much more quickly than States-side, giving them very little time to track down the real murderer.

The dead bodies start piling up	The confession that never helped

The investigation is a sequence of cameos in which Shirley Huang (who also briefly appears nude in the opening credits sequence along with Tina Ti) and Helen Ma show up to play the lovely ex-conquests of Zhou who are still alive. They also testify that he has no homicidal tendencies although he does like to bite his ladies on the inner thigh.

Damn, my tie looks better on her	Shirley Huang in a cameo

The trap that catches the killer is simplicity itself. Let's just say that one should never, never trust a woman who has repeatedly despised him, rebuffed him, and ignored him, and who then suddenly makes an about-face and willingly lets herself be carried to bed, fluttering her eyelashes coyly and seductively. It just does not happen, so one can always be sure that some game is afoot. With the identity of the real killer revealed, the two love birds are reunited and the diary symbolically destroyed, meaning that (a) Xiulan will sleep with Zhou, and (b) Zhou will probably not sleep with others, or at least won't foolishly put it in writing.

The private eye gets a shiner	When a man loves a woman but she doesn't...

There are several scenes where the Japanese hand of the director manifests itself in very nicely staged sequences (I was quite partial to the rain scene). The film has the unmistakable feel of a pink eiga, which is where Nikkatsu ended up going in the years to come. There is no nudity in the film itself (that is, there is none that is revealing), so the title sequence is a bit misleading. The film does sag in pacing, and the fact that the audience knows all about the killer does not help at all. Still, the leads' performances were quite satisfactory, so it's not a total waste of time.

...the gal in the fridge gets it	The End of the Diary of a Lady-Killer

The Celestial Pictures DVD offers the usual clean widescreen anamorphic transfer at 2.35:1. The Mandarin soundtrack is mono only for some reason. The English subtitles are nice (although somewhat inconsistent in the spelling of the names) and readable. The extras include the obligatory still gallery, trailers, and talent files. If one is into these types of movies, this DVD is a nice way to own this film. Otherwise, stay away.

December 14, 2003